Should you hug on a first date? How and When to Do It Right (2023) (2023)


Wondering if you should hug on a first date? If you're reading this, you can be sure you want to do this, and maybe even go further.

The problem is, the boundaries of physical contact on a first date are always fluid, as every woman you meet is likely to have a different level of comfort.

Fortunately, there are some rules you can follow to always understand how comfortable a woman is with you. By following these rules, you can constantly assess how far a woman is willing to physically go on a first date. We'll take a closer look at how you can do this in the following article.

More importantly, we take a deeper answer to the question "should I hug her on the first date?". Also, here are some tips on how to hug her in a way that isn't the least bit awkward.

Should you hug on a first date?

In general, you should always try to hug a woman on a first date.

In fact, you should initiate as much physicality as you want. with every courtshipMan's job is to leadand the female follows.

Most women will be too shy to initiate physical contact on a first date, or find it easy to do so. Also, they want a man who is bold and assertive enough to make the first move.

See also

(Video) My 3 EASY TRICKS To Make First Dates Less AWKWARD | Matthew Hussey

11 huge red flags for the first dateShould you kiss on a first date?

Apart from that, it is also important to respect the physical limitations of the woman. You have to climb at a pace that she is comfortable with.

If you try to hug her on a first date and she tenses up, that's a sure move too fast. In that case, you should stop hugging her, spend more time getting to know her, and try again later.

Physical contact is an important part.flirt with a girl, especially since it gives you an idea of ​​how comfortable she is with you.

For example, if a woman tenses up during a hug, now you know that's what happened.bad idea kiss herOr try another risky physical flirt. If she gives you a full hug during a hug, it's a sign that she's ready to get even more physical with you.

Light, playful touches are an important part of flirting. Without them, a woman will often feel that she just wants friendship and nothing more, even if she is verbally flirting.

Hugging is one of the first physical milestones you want to achieve on a first date. Once she hugs you comfortably, test if she's receptive to holding hands, playfully squeezing her arms and legs, whispering in her ear, getting into her personal space, etc. ready to be kissed.

Unless you're looking for a hug or one of those other flirty touches, you won't know if she wants to kiss you or if she's willing to come back to your house for even more intimacy.

Hugging is essentially the first stepping stone to all the great physical intimacy that comes with a long-term relationship. And even if you're looking for a serious girlfriend, it's best if you try to accept hugs and other playful physical touches early on.

It doesn't make you a gentleman if you don't touch your date the first time you meet. Most likely, it makes him think that you are not attracted to him or that you are too cowardly to act. Neither conclusion will inspire her to accept an offer for a second date.

(Video) First Date Tips - How To Initiate Touch On A First Date

Physical contact, including hugging, is a great way to build a romantic connection. They also show that you are confident enough to attack this woman. So if you're going on a first date, it's important that you at least try.

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How to hug on a date

Worried that a hug would be awkward or inappropriate and make the date worse?

While a date that initially went well is unlikely to veer off course, a hug may well run awkwardly. The key to a well-executed hug is the position of both.

It's one of the many reasons that fine dining is a poor choice.first date places. You'll almost certainly be sitting across from each other with a table between you, which means you'll both have to stand up to hug each other and it'll be hard to engage in organic playful touches.

It is better to have drinks in a bar that has a corner or armchairs where you can sit next to each other.

Other awkward places to cuddle are: when sitting next to each other in the car and after any strenuous physical activity. Fortunately, there are plenty of ways to make sure your first hug goes smoothly.

Here are six tips to help you do withoutmake mistakes during your appointment.

  • If she's the second to go on a date, stand up and open your arms to hug her when she approaches you.
  • If you come in second and she's sitting at a table, stand next to her for a bit and see if she gets up to say hello. If she does, hug her.
  • Every time she says something cute, give her a hug to show her that you think she's adorable.
  • Whenever you make fun of her for something stupid, she said (which you definitely should on a first date) and she's upset with you, hug her as a form of playful apology.
  • Let's say you compete against each other during your date, perhaps a game of pool or a drinking game. In this case, you can hug her to congratulate her or express her condolences.
  • When the date is over, open your arms wide and say "give me a hug."

These ideas are all practically foolproof as long as you own them without hesitation.

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If hugging you on a first date feels completely natural and not a big deal to you, it usually feels the same way to her. If you get nervous, she will notice and get nervous.

So believe in yourself! Not just with your hugs, but with everything you do on a first date. A confident and assertive man is attractive to most women.

Apart from that, it is also important to be aware of your body language. If your date tenses up during the hug, take it as a sign that she's not yet comfortable with that or something more intimate.

It's not the end of the world when this happens, it just means you're moving too fast. So, he stops hugging her and continues with the date as if nothing happened and tries again later. Perhaps as she progresses on the date, she will become more comfortable being with you physically.

A hug won't decide the first date by any means, but it's a good way to show your affection and give yourself a good idea of ​​where you stand with this woman.


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(Video) How To Hug A Girl And Escape The Friend Zone

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When should you hug on a first date? ›

You should hug at the beginning of the date. If she doesn't hug back, it's a sign that the date will not go very well. But a hug at the end of the date, as opposed to a kiss, is typically a bad thing. It shows that she isn't interested enough in you and wants to keep displays of affection low-key.

Should I hug my date on the first date? ›

Physical touching, including hugs, are a great way to spark a romantic connection. They also show that you are, in fact, confident enough to make a move on this woman. So, if you're on a first date, it's essential that you at least try to do this.

When a guy gives you a hug after a first date? ›

You Hug or Kiss At The End Of The Night

If your date offers up a hug or a chaste kiss, that's also a good sign. It shows that they are attracted to you at least a little bit, and they're wanting physical contact, which shows chemistry. Getting physical doesn't always mean a date went well, either.

Who should initiate a hug? ›

Either one. It doesn't matter. Just as long as you're both okay with it. But definitely ask if the hug is wanted.

Who kisses first on a date? ›

When it comes to kissing on a first date, it's important to remember that it's totally your decision. As no two first dates are alike, it's up to you to decide whether you'd like to kiss this person or not. And in most cases, this simply happens in the moment.

What are first date rules? ›

8 Rules for the First Date
  • Rule 1: Do not go out on the same night that he calls and asks you out. ...
  • Rule 2: Do not hang on every word he says. ...
  • Rule 3: Do not be a conversation hog. ...
  • Rule 4: Stay away from “ex” talk. ...
  • Rule 5: Resist asking about his previous relationships. ...
  • Rule 6: Do not get drunk and dance on his lap.

How do you know if it was a good date? ›

Top 10 Signs of a Good First Date That Lead to a Reencounter
  • You Can Be Yourself. ...
  • You're Both Present. ...
  • You made each other laugh. ...
  • You lose track of time. ...
  • You feel a deep attraction between each other. ...
  • You have things in common, but not too many. ...
  • You're respectful with each other. ...
  • You talk about your friends and family.
Apr 19, 2021

How do you end a first date? ›

The bottom line is that ending a first date on a positive note by thanking this person for coming and meeting up with you is a simple gesture that can go a long way.

How much should you touch on a first date? ›

“On a first date, touch should be limited and only natural, friendly, and warm—not sexual,” Lieberman says. In other words, it's fine to take their hand to help them out of your car, or put your hand on their lower back to lead them through a crowded restaurant.

What are red flags on a first date? ›

Other red flags include a date who is a bit too touchy and sexual right away, especially if you've made your physical and sexual boundaries clear in the beginning; someone who complains all the time during the date and is overly critical (especially of you); and someone who shows up late, doesn't inform you ahead of ...

Who should text first after a date? ›

A slight rift emerges in the crucial issue of who should text first after a date: Men are a little more likely to say the woman should text first, while women are more likely to say the man should text first. But the majority of men and women surveyed are in agreement: It doesn't matter who texts first.

How do you know if there is chemistry on a first date? ›

8 Promising Signs Of Chemistry On A First Date
  1. Your Sense Of Humor Jives. ...
  2. You Can Sense Your Date's Perspective. ...
  3. Your Touches Match. ...
  4. You Want To Be Snuggly. ...
  5. Your Date Senses If Something Upsets You. ...
  6. Your Conversations Flow. ...
  7. Your Boundaries And Rules Break. ...
  8. You Try New Things.
Oct 11, 2018

Where do you touch a guy when hugging? ›

Wrap one hand behind his back, just above his butt. Place the other hand around his neck so that your fingers rest where his neck meets his shoulder. Lightly grab onto the left side of his neck (his right side) with your left hand. If you're extra romantic, you can lightly tousle the back of his hair with your fingers.

What kind of hugs do guys like? ›

The 'Grasp On Waist' Hug

If you ask us, “what types of hugs do guys like the most, " here is your answer! This kind of intimate hug suggests that you share a very close bond with your partner where there is love, trust, and lots of romance. It is a beautiful way of spicing things between you and your partner.

What not to say on a first date? ›

10 Things You Should Never Say On A First Date
  • I love you. It's a nice sentiment but it's too soon babe. ...
  • Tell me about your ex. ...
  • My ex always used to say that. ...
  • You don't look like your photo. ...
  • Call them by the wrong name. ...
  • You're paying for this right? ...
  • My family are CRAZY! ...
  • I've got another date after this one…
Mar 22, 2017

What to say after first date? ›

Examples of what to text after a first date:
  • “Thanks for a really great time. I had fun tonight.”
  • “I had a really nice time with you last night. We should do it again sometime.”
  • “Had fun tonight! Will you text me when you get home so I know you made it safely?”
  • “Last night was super fun. [Inside joke from the date>.”
Feb 25, 2020

What questions are good for a first date? ›

Here is a list of 10 questions to ask on the first date:
  • “What Makes You Unique?” ...
  • ” What are some random fun facts about you?” ...
  • “What's Something You Want to Learn or Wish You Were Better At?” ...
  • “Would You Rather…?” ...
  • “Know Any Good Jokes?” ...
  • “What's Your Favorite Place on Earth?” ...
  • “Who Are the Special People in Your Life?”

What is the three date rule? ›

The three-date rule, as firmly practiced by Charlotte York, stated that the third date was the appropriate time to have sex with a guy. But according to this survey, the old three-date rule is out, and now, women are waiting five dates before having sex.

What is the most ideal first date? ›

Set a date, and get ready for a fun time.
  • Have a coffee date at a bookstore. ...
  • Pick something from a farm. ...
  • Engage in friendly competition. ...
  • Go to an arcade. ...
  • Go for a walk. ...
  • Opt for a hike. ...
  • Dine at your date's favorite restaurant. ...
  • Swing by a museum or art gallery.
Aug 26, 2022

How should you face on a first date? ›

Read on for 15 first date tips that will help you feel calm and confident—and give you the best chance for a second date.
  1. Pick the right first date spot. ...
  2. Date safely. ...
  3. Dress for confidence and comfort. ...
  4. Relax on your date. ...
  5. Give thoughtful compliments. ...
  6. Ask good questions. ...
  7. Have a dating budget. ...
  8. Watch your body language.
Sep 15, 2022

How do you tell if a date is not going well? ›

We asked dating experts for their best advice on knowing if someone is just not feeling a second date, besides you know, them saying it.
  1. They are easily distracted.
  2. You've gone a full day without a follow-up.
  3. Your conversation has grown dull.
  4. There is no enthusiasm on the first date.
  5. The vibe isn't sincere.
Jun 28, 2019

How do you tell if a guy likes you? ›

22 Subtle Signs A Guy Likes You, From Dating Experts
  1. He leans toward you during conversation. ...
  2. He angles his body toward you in the room. ...
  3. He finds small ways to compliment you. ...
  4. He makes eye contact. ...
  5. He steals a glance at you. ...
  6. He singles you out in a group. ...
  7. He seems drawn to you in the room.
Nov 26, 2021

What is the 3 day rule after first date? ›

Popularized by the romcom, the three-day dating rule insists that a person wait three full days before contacting a potential suitor. A first-day text or call is too eager, a second-day contact seems planned, but three days is, somehow, the perfect amount of time.

How do I not ruin a first date? ›

Listen to your date and focus on having a great time, instead of thinking of getting laid. Don't forget your manners: Please don't forget your manners, being impolite is never acceptable. Apart from basic table manners, it's important to behave politely with everyone else also.

How long should first date be? ›

A dating etiquette expert shared the ideal first date length in order to determine if there is a spark. Ryan Seacrest shared the amount of time your first date should last… and that is: 90 MINUTES. It's long enough to gauge if there's a spark but also short enough for your date to want to see you again, or vice versa.

How do you greet a guy on a first date? ›

Whether a handshake or a hug is appropriate – The answer may be found in the posture of your date. If the person keeps a distance, then a handshake and a friendly “Hello” are your best choice.

Is physical touch OK on first date? ›

Here's the bottom line: Gentle touch on a first date indicates your care, interest, and respect in the other person. There is plenty of time for physical affection as you get to know one another on a deeper level.

How do you tell if a guy is serious about you first date? ›

7 Signs To Tell if a Guy Is Serious About You
  1. He Listens to You. If a guy is serious about you, he will really listen and he won't take anything you say for granted. ...
  2. He Makes Future Plans. ...
  3. He Checks Up on You. ...
  4. He Helps You with Any Problem. ...
  5. He Makes You a Priority. ...
  6. He Does Thoughtful Things. ...
  7. He Introduces You to His Friends.

What is the biggest red flag in a guy? ›

13 red flags in a relationship to look out for
  • Narcissism. ...
  • Anger management issues. ...
  • Codependency. ...
  • Inability to resolve conflict. ...
  • Constant jealousy. ...
  • Gaslighting. ...
  • Lack of emotional intelligence. ...
  • Negatively affecting your relationship with family and friends.
Feb 1, 2022

What is the 3 month rule? ›

Basically, after a break-up, the three-month rule is a rule that says you and your ex are both given 3 months before entering the dating scene again. Just waiting it out, and mourning that your relationship ended. Just go on with your individual separate lives and see what happens.

When should they text you after first date? ›

It's good to let you and her both reflect on the date, and then follow up within 2-3 days to meet up again." "Within" is the key word here—you might be pushing it if you wait until the end of day three.

How long should a guy go without texting you? ›

Give it a few days (or even a week).

It might feel tough waiting for him to text you, but your crush might truly be busy and unable to respond to your messages right away. Waiting 2–3 days or up to a week before reaching out gives him a chance to text you first once he realizes what he's missing.

Will he text you if he likes you? ›

In conclusion, if he likes you, he will text you. How guys text you when they like you varies, but some are consistent. For example, a guy will ask many questions about you, text first, compliment you, send emojis, make you laugh, find reasons to talk to you, and give hints for a date.

How do you tell if there is a spark on a date? ›

If You & Your Date Have A Spark, Experts Say You'll Notice These 5 Things
  1. The spark can feel like a body high. Giphy. ...
  2. You are urgently curious to get to know one another. Giphy. ...
  3. You and your date share plenty of eye contact. Giphy. ...
  4. You feel a rush of energy. Giphy. ...
  5. You're a little nervous and can't think straight. Giphy.
Jan 31, 2019

How do you know if your date wants a relationship? ›

25 Undeniable Signs He Wants A Relationship With You
  • There's No Chasing. Save. ...
  • He Opens Up To You. ...
  • He Respects Your Boundaries. ...
  • He Plans Dates For You Two. ...
  • He Doesn't Shy Away From Labels. ...
  • He Thinks About A Future With You. ...
  • He Introduces You To His Family And Friends. ...
  • He Is Honest With You.
Dec 12, 2022

How soon is too soon to make out? ›

There's no right time, so let your kiss happen spontaneously. If you try choosing a specific time for your first kiss, you may start feeling a little anxious waiting. Take a breath, relax, and just pay attention if you're feeling that romantic spark.

How do you hug without being awkward? ›

A guide to avoiding awkward hugs
  1. ONE: Hone your technique. A bear hug is not an appropriate social hug. ...
  2. TWO: Avoid the prolonged hug. ...
  3. THREE: Try not to ask first. ...
  4. FOUR: Choose your moment. ...
  5. FIVE: Consider your target. ...
  6. SIX: Hugs should be mutual. ...
  7. SEVEN: Not everyone relishes the hug. ...
  8. EIGHT: The unwanted hug.
Jul 25, 2017

How long should a hug last? ›

The quick answer is about 3 seconds, according to a new study of the post-competition embraces of Olympic athletes.

How do you tell by a hug if a guy likes you? ›

Generally, the lower the hands, the higher the physical attraction. If their arms encircle your waist and they press their hands against your lower back, that might be a romantic hug—especially if they draw your lower body in closer to theirs.

How does a guy hug a girl he likes? ›

Resist the urge to dive in and hug her as quickly as possible. Instead, take a deep breath and move in at a pace that allows her to decide whether or not she wants to hug you. Make eye contact, move a little bit closer to her, then lift your arms and pull her in.

When a guy rubs your back while hugging you? ›

This affectionate gesture signifies that your guy cares deeply about you. "The back is a very vulnerable part of the body," Wood says. "You can't see your back, so being touched there can be startling." Softly rubbing you on such an exposed zone shows that he wants to nurture and protect you.

What is a flirty hug? ›

How do you make a hug flirty? To hug romantically, wrap your arms around your partner's waist if you're taller than them, or wrap your arms around their neck if you're shorter. Then, when you're hugging, nuzzle your head into your partner's chest or neck to make the hug more intimate.

How do you hug someone you are attracted to? ›

To add an extra romantic touch, nuzzle your head or even your face into the head/neck of the other person (or chest, if you're much shorter than the person you're hugging). Squeeze and hold. A romantic hug lasts longer than a platonic hug. Gently clutch a little tighter for two or three seconds.

When should you hold a girl's hand on a first date? ›

If you're feeling ready to graduate from the hand-graze to the full knit, Mannello suggests that you wait until after your first kiss. “That signifies that you've shared some kind of sexual intimacy,” he says. At that point, a more traditional hand-holding grip is totally on the table.

How many dates before holding hands? ›

When it feels natural and comfortable. There's no particular number of dates, it might be the first one or the twenty-third one - it depends on what you did or are doing together, whether there's a spark there, and whether you're both the kind of people that do hand-holding.

Do you hug someone you meet for the first time? ›

Arms open slightly and ready to hug.

It's often hard to tell if you should hug at first. After all, we usually hug people we know really well or haven't seen in a while. Yet, if you have established rapport even over email, it might make perfect sense to greet each other in a warm but brief embrace.

Do you hug a girl when you first meet them? ›

Should you hug a woman or shake her hand when first meeting them? The proper etiquette is not to touch her at all unless she extends her hand to you first or she attempts to hug you first. There's no one-size-fits-all “yes” or “no” to this question. Cultural and personal preferences are always relevant.

What should I do with my hands on a first date? ›

Trust. Occasional physical contact is OK -- a hand to the small of the back, a touch of the thigh, a brief holding of the arm while making a point. Do not grab anywhere in the red light zones. If we want your hands there, we will put them there.

How many dates until you are physical? ›

There's no right or wrong number of dates (however you define that!) to wait until having sex (however you define that!). Whether it's been zero, three, 300, or infinity dates, what's most important is that: you want to have sex. the person(s) you're going to be having sex with want to have sex.

Should you hug or shake hands on a first date? ›

The classic handshake is fine, however, if you expect more of the date and have already developed a few feelings, it's simply too formal. A good alternative is a hug. That's ok too. But it should be a friendly hug first.

How many dates until you're exclusive? ›

If a couple goes on one date a week, that's anywhere from 10 to 12 dates before they establish exclusivity, according to the survey. Say, schedules allow a couple to see each other more than once a week, that means it could even take 24 dates before exclusivity.

Is it OK to hug a guy you just met? ›


Studies (like this one from University Milano-Bicocca) have determined that embracing someone can boost your immune system. Hugging someone right after meeting them shows them that you're a kind person who's open and friendly.

What happens after the first hug? ›

When we reach out, a chemical called oxytocin — also dubbed the “love hormone” — kicks in and makes us feel warm and fuzzy inside. The effects of a warm embrace can linger long after the hug: Oxytocin promotes feelings of trust, nurturing, and calm. A hug can even improve your physiological stability.

Should I ask before I hug? ›

Hug Etiquette

-Ask permission before hugging someone, unless you are already on intimate terms with the person. -Hug accordingly. Remember, there is a difference between a friendly hug and a passionate embrace. A hug between romantic partners is much different than a hug between two people who have just met.

How do you hug a girl when you first meet? ›

Keep your hands on the back of her waist if she intends to keep hers on your shoulders. Lean in closely and maybe even give a light kiss on her cheek or neck. Hug her tight and never be the first one to back away. Don't worry about it too much.

How do you let a girl know you want a hug? ›

Do you want to hug? Creative ways to ask for a hug
  1. “Can I hug you?”
  2. “Can you hug me?”
  3. “Can you give me a little hug?”
  4. “Would it be okay if I gave you a hug?”
  5. “Would you like me to wrap my arms around you?”
  6. “Would you be willing to give me a hug right now?”
  7. “Would you be into a side hug?”
  8. “Want a hug?”
Jan 9, 2019

How do you initiate your first hug? ›

Start the hug with a gentle touch on the arm, eye contact, or a smile. Whether you're in love or just dating, there is really no wrong way to move in for a hug. So just do it! A casual touch can be used to introduce a casual hug, and an intimate touch can be used to introduce an intimate hug.


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